Let's Talk - Body Positivity!

June 17, 2017

Hi all! Welcome to another Let's Talk segment by yours truly, I've done a few of these in the past and I've had some fabulous people work with me to share their views on various topics. To find my past Let's Talk segments click HERE!

Today's post focuses on Body Positivity and I have another three amazing guest writers that have taken time to share their thoughts, so please give it up for;
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These beautiful ladies have written me their own segments to include in this topic that you can find below:

@Abbwhi on Twitter
Abbie's thoughts: "Hey everyone! So this topic is a rather important one for me. The most important thing to remember is that body positivity is different for every single person and not everyone has the same end goals or aims. Also, not everyone will agree with your definition or image of body positivity but thats personal to you, so others opinions should not affect that. 

For me, body positivity is when you feel the most happy with how you look and feel, you don't care about others opinions of you and you feel comfortable and confident. Who doesn't want that? This can come from diet, workouts or just looking at yourself in the mirror and thinking damn I look good today and I don’t care what anyone else thinks. 

I am not one to be 100% positive in how I look at all, I consider myself to have problem areas but you do not realise how much others have the same lack of confidence in certain areas of their body as you. Most people will be insecure about something but they have learnt to accept it. I have certain areas myself that I will cover up because that makes me feel more confident. My weight can change on a daily, I can have times when I feel urgh and I can have times when I’m like yesssss I feel good but that is called being human. 

I feel the most body positive when I have been to the gym or done a fitness class, that feeling when you are sweating and your muscles start to hurt, you know you have done your body good. For me, being active in some way helps me to feel good and one day hopefully I will be confident enough within myself to be like yessss I feel good everyday. It is difficult being a female because obviously we have unwanted visitors every month and my god, I most definitely notice a difference then, the body positivity goes wayyyyyyy down, I get bloated and all I want to do is eat.  This does not do your body positivity any good but there are alternatives, I sometimes find working out helps during this time even though it can be more of a chore to get yourself there but after you will feel a little better. 

Like I said at the start body positivity isn't the same for everyone and if someone is positive and comfortable in their body then who are you to let them feel any less than that. It is an achievement and such an amazing thing to see people loving their bodies and being confident in it. Everyone should get to experience that feeling at some point. These are just ways that work or help me but like I said, it is individual and personal so you find your way of achieving this and get yourself feeling yesssssss I look good!"

@NaomieCarpenter on Twitter
Naomi's thoughts: "Body positivity… what does that mean to me?

Not too long ago I wrote a blog post on how I now felt about accepting the fact that I was a firm member of the itty bitty titty committee; I explained how much confidence I had gained in doing so and how no one should let anyone else’s opinion get in the way of that.

I was in an insane place in terms of body positivity when I wrote that and wondered “Am I right to go on to talk about body positivity when I’m not actually feeling very positive myself right now?” But as I read my own words back to myself, I realized, actually that is the very best possible time to talk about it.

“Accepting your body for how it is, is one of the hardest/most mentally draining things to try to do and it rarely gets easier! But even just accepting one tiny thing (or two lol) about yourself is a massive triumph!” – Itty Bitty Irrelevance

How alien it feels having to take your own advice… Body positivity isn’t about being confident all the time or loving every inch of your body every second of the day or being able to take bikini insta pics on demand. It’s about learning how to be positive about the body that is yours. Whether you feel you have 185759 flaws or just that tiny little 1 you can’t stop thinking about, ultimately, it’s how you decided to perceive them.

I can’t sit here and not expect “how can I just change how I feel about my body?!” because before I realized how important it is trying to love yourself I was exactly the same!

“t’s an uphill struggle trying to love your bits and bobs and everyone HAS to go at their own pace. It’s taken me 24 years and is still something I struggle with every day but WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER. (automatically starting singing HSM after typing that, fyi)” – Itty Bitty Irrelevance

And every word of that is true. Everyone is going through the same thought process before leaving the house, undressing in front of their partner or even posting that selfie they’ve taken 8346 times already (we’ve all been there.) As humans in 2017 our brains are conditioned to think we have to be perfect 24/7… which is totally fine actually because the truth is you are perfect, in your own unique and beautifully ‘flawed’ way. I can 100% guarantee you can’t see why your best friend doesn’t think they are the most beautiful person on the planet, no? Exactly. It’s about how we perceive ourselves and a little bit of positivity goes a bloody long way.

Even if you don’t feel you can be positive right away just try your hardest not to be as negative? I spent years listing all my faults to every person I met so that they would know that I knew I wasn’t perfect and then they wouldn’t judge me, right? Nope, very wrong. I just put myself down in the hope that they didn’t and that gets your NOWHERE.

All I’m trying to say is leave the house with a little sass in your step, flash that part of yourself you think isn’t perfect to the world… because regardless of what ANYONE else thinks, who’s thoughts do you hear the most? x"

@JadirahSarmad
Jadirah's thoughts: "Growing up, amongst my cousins I was considered to be the skinny one. That never really bothered me and as a child and I was always body positive as my own family told me to not pay any heed to such things. However, when I was in the second year of my university, I started putting on weight due to my busy schedule and immense stress. Even though I had only gained a few pounds, when other people started pointing out how my face and arms looked bigger, it was a bit of a shock for me.
To be honest, I did not see a different Jadirah in the mirror; perhaps because I was used to of seeing me every day and never noticed a change. But the weight machine and the photographs indicated differently. However, those two did not matter much once the medical reports said that my weight was well under control and in fact was approved to be in the normal range. I felt fine and accepted the changes in my body to be the changes that come with age.
What actually left me gobsmacked was the first time when someone made a comment at a blogger event. As I was about to eat a spoonful of my chocolate ice cream, another blogger, who was only an acquaintance remarked, ‘You should go easy on the desserts as you have gained weight’. There were four to five other people present at that table and the comment had not only caught me off guard but had also left me feeling embarrassed. Truth is I am pretty happy in my skin and still do not see that there is anything wrong with my body. I am not even overweight to begin with, but just because I was skinny before and have put on a little bit of flesh now, I am all of a sudden categorized as fat!
I find this ridiculous and it is sad how people do not even think twice before saying something nasty like that. Body shaming is not at all okay, yet it has been widely normalized. It just goes to show how inconsiderate those people are to see it as their right to give an opinion that nobody even asked for.
What I have noticed is that most of the time people who make such comments are insecure about themselves but just because I am more confident in putting myself out there as a blogger, they expect me to be carved to perfection. That can never be the case! We are all different, we have different body types, different body needs and we are bound to physically change with age.
Initially, I did not know how to respond if someone out of the blue said, ‘Your cheeks look rounder’, but now I do make sure to shut my haters down by openly confronting them. If I was okay with my petite little body as a child, I am okay with more meat on me today too. There will always be people who belittle others but in order to stay body positive it is important to surround yourself with people who see more in you than just your outward appearance."

Itsallzara on Twitter
My thoughts: "Body positivity is something I never thought I would have. Ever. I like many other females have judged, hated and critiqued my body non stop since I was around 8 or 9. I've always struggled with my weight and my confidence but I truly think over the last year or so I've learned a lot about just appreciating what I have. Okay so I'll never be extremely skinny due to having a larger frame, and alright I'm a little more pale than I'd like but so what? Its time for me to stop worrying about whats WRONG with my body and start praising it for its hard work to keep me alive and healthy. Don't judge yourself too harshly because you never know who's looking at you and wishing they had your appearance! As long as you follow a healthy diet and exercise as often as you can, the body you have will be in good shape no matter what it looks like!

To apply for a writing position in my Let's Talk segments you can email me at zaraanne@hotmail.co.uk or tweet me at @itsallzara! Thank you for reading x

Itsallzara

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